Thirty Seconds To Love

Several years ago, I read “Everybody Always” by the famous Bob Goff. He has a chapter called Three Minutes at a Time in his book. Throughout the chapter, he focuses on a TSA worker named Adrian, with Whom he had built a friendship with 3 minutes at a time. Adrian was the guy who checked everyone’s ID’s and he stood out to Bob for the way he treated those in line with love and respect. Bob wanted to meet him so one day as he handed Adrian his ID he shook his hand and introduced himself. He thanked him for how he treated everyone in line and told him the way he treats them reminds him of the way Jesus loved. From that moment on the two formed a friendship that was built up three minutes at a time that eventually went beyond the airport meetings.

“Friendships can last a lifetime, but we make them three minutes at a time.” - BG

After I read that chapter I challenged myself to what I call 30-second relationships. As a lifeguard and a somewhat busy human, you don’t always have three minutes. Technically in my profession, I’m not supposed to talk to people while I’m working (Oops) but I’ll be honest I just don’t make eye contact, watch my water and talk anyways (just don’t tell my bosses). Over the last years and several 30- second conversations, I have grown many friendships that will last a lifetime! Each one started with “Hello!” and “Good-bye, have a good day!” Over time those conversations moved to “I didn’t catch your name?” and “I’ll see you same time tomorrow.” If someone missed a day I knew it, if they were late for their daily morning swim I knew it and if they were just simply having an “off” day well I knew that as well.

Four years later and many 30-second conversations, I can sit here and tell you just about everyone who walks through those pool doors between the hours of 5 am-9 am and sometimes right up to 4 pm. I can tell you their name, swim time, how long they will swim, what lane they will pick, and for most their occupations and life stories. Crazy I know!

Sometimes as we are going about our daily lives we try and love others the best we can but we don’t always feel like we are doing a very good job. Each day I wake up with the goal of loving others. I wake up and immediately think “Okay God, who am I going to love today?” Somedays are admittedly harder than others. But even on the bad days, I put a smile on my face, go to work, (as an old boss and now great friend would say) wipe my feet at the door leaving whatever is going on off the pool deck and I love on my members.

Yesterday, I got up and went to work one last time. Little did I know I would leave with tear-filled eyes. As I said goodbye to friendships I had built over the last four years. The 30-seconds of loving each one of them was returned back to me. Many of them begged me not to leave, they showered me with gifts, hugs and thanked me for keeping them safe over the years. One particular group of swimmers all nearing 70-80years old told me how proud they are of me and to make sure I write to them. An older man who comes in religiously at 6 am (full of jokes I might add) hugged me and said “I expect you to visit, you’re one of us and we will miss you greatly!”

Several weeks ago one lady in her 70’s was having a rough time so I sat by the pool and talked with her for 40mins. As she left with tears in her eye she grabbed my arm and said “I just want you to know I love you. You have become one of my best friends over the years. I don’t have anyone and you always come in here with a smile on your face, you talk to us, you know our good days and bad and most of all you love us. No other guard does that the way you do. You’re family and we will miss you greatly when you leave. I love you!”

I could go on for days and weeks about how I’ve practiced these 30-second relationships in and out of the workplace and how they’ve changed not only my life but the life of others as well.

My friends that its what it’s all about! As I reflect over the years what I’ve learned is just by simply loving in 30-seconds can change the life of one person at a time. No matter where you are in life or what you are going through I encourage you to LOVE. 30-seconds that’s all it takes! Say high to that TSA worker, that Cashier you see weekly, your Mailman, the Security guard in your building, WHOEVER it is in your path today or even daily because they need to be loved! You will be amazed at the number of friendships you will build and the love that you will receive in return! It starts with 30-seconds and hello and grows from there.

Can you imagine how different our world would be if everyone in it took at least 30-seconds (or even three minutes) a day to love someone else? Would it change the world we are living in? Would there be less hurt and less pain? Would those who feel alone feel like there’s someone out there?

For a few months now, my best friend and I have been doing a love challenge where each week we challenge each other to go out and love in our daily lives. Then at the end of the week, we check in with each other to see how we did. I didn’t realize how much I was actually loving others, even during the harder times, until I sat and reflected each week. I’ll be honest some weeks are harder than others and sometimes I don’t feel like loving at all. But then I remember the amount of love Jesus shows me daily and on the cross. He didn’t make excuses He just loved! That’s the kind of love I should be showing each day. We love because we want to be the difference that this world needs!

Are you willing to join that challenge with us and be the difference this world needs? If yes, I challenge you in “Thirty Seconds to Love” and go out and build those relationships! If you don’t know where to start just ask me! I’d love to help guide you!

To my members at the YMCA, if you see this, thank you for letting me love you and thank you for loving me in return!